Thursday, 8 March 2012

Admitting Defeat

I weaned myself off my anti-depressants a couple of months ago (with help & advice from my GP). I had been feeling really positive, like I could take most things on, so I felt that it was the right time.

I am now having to admit defeat. I have been snappy & impatient with my girls at times, have lost motivation & am feeling generally rubbish & down in the dumps.

It seems I have also become very "aggressive" towards Hubby - not physically aggressive but very argumentative.  I have been very confrontational about the lack of help I get around the house & with the girls - how dare I go up & have a bath & colour my hair before the girls are asleep when Hubby had been asleep on the sofa all the way through tidying & cleaning up after dinner & also putting the girls up to bed only to be rudely woken up by Abby crying & both girls then playing up a little bit (while I'm in the bath with colour on my hair!).  Apparently that was the final straw when Hubby declared last night that I should go back on my tablets or **** off because he can't cope with me as well right now.

I am aware that I have been a bit more snappy lately but, to be honest, I had been viewing it as more of a reasonable reaction to Hubby's daily routine of getting up at 10.30-11am (sometimes later), plonking himself on the sofa with tv on or his PS3 game & staying there pretty much until bedtime (unless I drag him out to the shops or something). This routine in comparison to me ferrying Freya to nursery, taking them both to playgroups, doing the housework, cooking, washing, ironing & trying to occupy the girls when Daddy "can't help them at the moment as he's stuck on this part of his game" & then listening to Hubby complaining about how fed up he is & how he hates his life.  It seems my reaction is not reasonable.

I therefore have an appointment with the doctor this evening where I will be asking to go back on my medication.


Ps. This is my only outlet at the moment and so I am letting off a fair bit of steam. Apologies.  Please also bear in mind that there are 2 sides to every story, so while my views & opinions stand at the moment they may not be entirely fair.

1 comment:

  1. You sound pretty reasonable to me Laura, we musn't forget how important it is for our menfolk to do these things, my husband thinks i'm terrible because I don't rush home to do housework etc after being out of the house (at work) for 13 hours a day, very unreasonable I know !!!. You sound like you were doing quite well to me, but good to see what your doctor has to say, a bit more support at home might help, or so it sounds, and sorry if I'm wrong. You vent your frustration here as much as you need to.

    Take care and chin up.

    Jill x